[Chinese BG novel] 大佬穿成女配(快穿) by 大白牙牙牙 / Big boss becomes a supporting character

Summary: Third book about Heng Yu. A woman with unknown background who calls herself Heng Yu and turns the tide of her life when she travels the world.

The official description of this novel on JJ is a complete bs and does not represent the novel at all, since it mentions Heng Yu as a stepping stone. Basically, sometimes we know who is a protag and who is not, but usually we know nothing.

In the previous book this is what I liked about the author's style, they did not reveal a thing and the story could flow in unknown direction.

But this time you could hear phrases like "the memory was uploaded" etc. while it doesn't really change everything, we know nothing about the "original" direction. In many cases Heng Yu is not even a stepping stone, she feels like a random fodder tbh.

This novel is shorter and also the style is dry, unlike the previous book which at least could entertain you along with seriousness of some arcs, but this time it's just dry descriptions, a lot of those.

Also the book contains only 4 arcs, even if they're long, but I still think they kinda perfunctory.

Arc 1 is an ancient plane where Heng Yu is the sole survivor of her clan. This is a funnier arc in the beginning since Heng Yu fools a lot of people, here she meets a male protag and actually uses him as a magnet for talents she uses for herself. She starts as a small mountain bandit, then grows the economy of her small place and grows an army from refugees. Then she slowly infiltrates two provinces. Wins the third one and becomes a strength to be reckoned with. Basically returns with glory and restores the good name of her family of generals.

Arc 2 has a martial arts background, Heng Yu wanted to have fun after solving the imminent crisis - she is a fodder to be sacrificed to forge a sword. But then she becomes the best swordsman in the world and with the help of the plot solves the biggest sect that threatened to become sole force in the future.

Arc 3 was a bit much, Heng Yu travels to the funding period of China (mentioned 50's) and helps to solve a number of crisises that her country faces, pretty patriotic arc.

But surprise came from a different angle, not because Heng Yu suddenly did everything, but because she had a partner. If I'm not wrong she never married in any of her lives, but she did here. A good man who did not intervene with her career when they both tried to support the motherland.

Arc 4 and the last one, actually liked it the most and it was more profound in characterization, but also made me cry. In this one Heng Yu decides to be a playboy (crossdresses a lot as a man) as original was in the past, but then she meets two young men, one is a descendant of a general and another is a third prince. The case that was being solved got them involved and by the sheer connection of a life and death situation they became close. The story basically covers up the decision of the three and how the naive young men could change in the turbullent struggle for power. Although Heng Yu warned the third prince, but the other still decided to go on a path that made him dislike himself for doing things he struggled in the past. That struggle resulted in a tragedy and this was such an emotional showcasing of the weight of some decisions.

of course this part can't be compared to the second installment which will forever be my favorite, but the last arc rehabed this novel for me. Because otherwise it felt like a recycled material too.

RATE: 3/5.

[AMBIENCE] Sunset Beach Bossa Ambience by Calmed by Nature

[NOVEL] King of Wrath by Ana Huang

Backlog#15

The last one.

I never read anything by Ana Huang, but I heard a lot about her Twisted series, like it's not that good, but it's still addicting. And when finishing reading this one I could feel it. It's I'd say a bit trashy, but in a good way of trashy, a fun way.

I'd compare it to the times when I read some tropy a bit melodramatic Chinese novels with lots of twists and turns.

She's the wife he never wanted...and the weakness he never saw coming.

Ruthless. Meticulous. Arrogant.

Dante Russo thrives on control, both personally and professionally.

The billionaire CEO never planned to marry—until the threat of blackmail forces him into an engagement with a woman he barely knows.

Vivian Lau, jewelry heiress and daughter of his newest enemy.

It doesn’t matter how beautiful or charming she is. He'll do everything in his power to destroy the evidence and their betrothal.

There’s only one problem: Now that he has her...he can't bring himself to let her go.

***

Elegant. Ambitious. Well-mannered.

Vivian Lau is the perfect daughter and her family’s ticket into the highest echelons of high society.

Marrying a blue-blooded Russo means opening doors that would otherwise remain closed to her new-money family.

While the rude, elusive Dante isn't her idea of a dream partner, she agrees to their arranged marriage out of duty.

Craving his touch was never part of the plan.

Neither was the worst thing she could possibly do: fall in love with her future husband.

Kings of Sin. Book 1

Come on, even the series is called Kings of Sin and it sounds kinda cool and cringe at the same time.

And I'm not gonna lie, I know it's obvious what type of literature it was, but I still had my fun.

So Dante was blackmailed into this one, Vivian was completely gaslighted about it. She tried to make this relationship work actually, because throughout the entire book she tried to become closer, then she noticed how Dante opened up a bit about himself and the next moment he is again closed off and they're back to square one of their relationship.

Dante never planned to marry, but the more time they spent together, the more the scales tilted. From one side he hated Vivian's father for blackmailing and putting his brother in a dangerous position, but from another side he was attracted to Vivian and she was becoming dear to him, so he was infront of a hard choice - vengeance or love.

I think the premise of this book is quite simple, but actuallythere is no need to invent stuff if the formula works.

But plotwise I already started to forget things. Basically because I started it before travelling and I was stressed and I finished it during a train ride and again I was stressed so I kept catching myself zoning out from time to time.

Yet I still had my fun with it with all the melodramatic tugging back and forth.

Note: it was actually helpful that I've read a ton of Chinese novels and got acquainted with some of the temperaments of Asian families. Helpful because if you have no idea why Vivian acts the way she does you might find it weird, like girl get away from your toxic family. But when you know more about it, motivation becomes clearer. I'm pretty sure if I had no idea I would be thinking - why don't you leave your family behind?

I had my fun, I hope to see all of her girlfriends having their own book, I noticed one will for sure (I haven't looked up the summaries of those books at all, so of course I have no idea what will happen next).

RATE: 4/5. For the fun I had. I am aware of shortcommings.

And this is the conclusion of the Backlog. All the books I've read in March (currently 9th of April).

The next one I'm reading now is the third book about Heng Yu, I once praised her story a lot since it was so non-mainstream. 

[Historical Romance] Lady Scandal by Laura Lee Guhrke

Backlog #14

I was on the roll with LLG and my eyes were on the latest of her. This is "Scandal at the Savoy" series that she is working on these years. Weird to say years but it is true, LLG releases book per year I think.

The first one was Bookshop Cinderella where FMC was taken to have a chance to have fun among the ton and spend her season with MMC and his sister.

The second book is about this sister.

Delia Stratham is a sophisticated, thoroughly modern woman who often flouts convention. Despite being well-born with plenty of money, she loves working at London's luxurious Savoy Hotel, coming up with ideas for the venue's lavish entertainments and then procuring whatever is needed to transform them into reality. Earning her own living planning the lavish banquets, balls, and parties for which the Savoy is famous gives her a satisfaction that none of her three marriages could—and she has no intention of giving it up.

But when fraud is uncovered at the Savoy, ruthless hotel magnate Simon Hayden becomes a major investor and vows to clean up the corruption and fire anyone responsible for the thefts. But is the beautiful, beguiling Delia stealing from the hotel, or is it just Simon’s heart she's running off with?

Scandal at the Savoy. Book 2

The premise of this book is pretty simple, Simon was appointed as a manager, because Savoy despite all the exterior glitz was losing in revenue for quite some time. He needed to investigate what is the cuase of it all and found out a big chain of corruption. But he couldn't make up his mind of Delia was a participant or oblivious lady.

It didn't help that Delia expressed some of her opinions on free stuff, ton paying in advance (because most of the nobles did not pay and only lived on credit as if it was an obvious thing to do, just because they had a title) etc. This is why it was hard for him to judge, only knowing her later when the sparks stopped flying around each time they met he realized that she is not that type of person, but one thing is to know and another is to find proof, so afterwards she will keep her position at the Savoy, since this place was important for her after the death of her last husband.

Actually proved to be a pretty nice book.

Although some may say that Simon took it too far with his suspicion, but I think he acted quite rational despite being completely charmed by Delia every time he saw her. He did not want the sudden passion to cloud his better judgement.

Delia actually had her own reasons to believe in things, partially she acted in accordance how other corrupt employees did, but she was oblivious to the entire situation overall. And she refused to believe that the person who took her away from misery could be so corrupt.

She is called a black widow behind her back, because she was married three times and all three husbands died, but they had their own causes of death. Delia herself says she has a worst taste in men. The first one had a d* addiction. Second was more of a romantic spirit, but she had no idea that he had mistresses and he died in a car crash with one of them. The last one was stable and older than her, now she wanted to have kids and live a life, but her husband died (I think smth like heart attack, forgot).

Now she was attracted to Simon at least as a lover, since she is a big girl and knows what she wants.

But has no idea that Simon's partially suspected her.

Note: The background of several characters is fictional, but LLG uses real people, like Ritz who opened his own hotel and was let go for unknown reason (so this is part of author's speculation). Savoy is still standing strong. I looked it up and it looked lovely.

Actually, she was innocent in all of those schemes that existed at Savoy, but it was decided to fire her regardless. Then she finds out and is furious, she wants to leave with Ritz to Paris and build a new hotel there. Bt she is not fully happy. Only when she talked to Ritz about her apartment she realized that Ritz used so much of hotel's funds inappropriately and wanted to fund her living in Paris and write it off as hotel's expenses. While she always paid for her bills she was shocked to finally see the truth.

But because Simon is righteous, he who was bound by obligation to never share the purpose of his investigation did not reveal to Delia anything, even if he wanted to. This is why by the last minute she did not hear the truth from him but waited for the note that she's fired from her position.

She was furious, he tried to make things better. No really he fell in love with her, was ready to propose and marry her. But the incident dropped a shadow on their relationship and she was still not informed.

I actually liked what he said at the end - would she find him as good if he actually betrayed the promise he made and shared the confidential things with her. But eventually he ssent her the letter with investigation results so she could see his sincerity and return to him. Yet she had the conversation with Ritz before she opened that letter.

And a happy ending when she returns.

Simon leaves Savoy and other hotel that was connected to a couple who hired him in the first place, but the husband was constantly sick and the wife was too hostile to Delia all the time and was responsible for her being fired.

Now he found investors to revitalize Mayfer in the face of Delia's brother and his friend, who actually have a feud.

The main characters of the next book actually have an extensive appearance in this one. It's a couple that wanted to elope but was stopped on the way. The man (Simon's friend) was deemed as dowry hunter, while the man thought his chosen one (Delia's friend) betrayed him because he was poor at that time. Now the man is rich and the girl is not so much, but she finally found herself a husband and he also is getting ready to marry. Exciting settings.

RATE: 4,25/5.

[Historical Romance] Wedding of the Season by Laura Lee Guhrke

Backlog #13

These are old books by LLG. Although it's harsh to say "old" but they're from '10s and it's more than a decade ago. Wedding of the Season is a first book in a series called "Abandoned at the Altar", which is an interesting concept. With upcoming book by LLG she actually returns to this trope.

I am reading these for the first time? I'm just not sure which from the two series of American Heiress and Abandoned I've read and which I did not.

Thing is I got to know LLG when I bought a book in my native language. But the problem with licensing and publishing of western historical romances is that not always they translate the series, they might as well just pick a book from a series and I'm not sure if publishers are aware of the fact. But they pick what they deem interesting and translate the book they want instead of translating entre series just because it is a series in original.

(oh good old Avon covers, I miss them, I feel sorry for Avon to basically being swallowed, but life is life)

Abandoned at the altar...

Lady Beatrix Danbury had always known she would marry William Mallory. She'd loved him forever, and she'd never doubted he loved her, too. But when she made him choose between their life together or his lifelong dream, Will chose the latter...and left two weeks before their wedding.

Return of the duke...

Will has no illusions that Beatrix would welcome him back with open arms, but six years did not dim his love or desire for her. The only problem is, she's about to marry someone else. Someone safe and predictable...the complete opposite of Will. But can he stop the wedding of the season and win Beatrix back, or is it just too late?

Abandoned at the Altar. Book 1

The main conflict of this book is that our Duke wanted to travel to Egypt in the search of tomb of Tut. But Beatrix wasn't ready for such a sacrifice.

And it's not that she's a bad person, but actually I wish LLG would dive deeper into her controlled childhood. We basically should read between the lines how her own father controlled her so she would always stay the closest to him, Will even suspected that he allowed the two of them have such an extensive relationship because they were neighbors and her father expected Will to stay close. Only because Beatrix's mother eloped for love to Paris, to paint and be with her lover (she had some unknown devastatingly sad ending in poverty and infamy). This is why Beatrix's father did instil many of the things in her head throughout the years. And this is why when it came to choosing she couldn't choose her lover, because otherwise she would leave her father behind (almost like her mother).

Years later Will returns to England in the need of a sponsor and the one he thinks will help him is none other than Lord Marlowe (here we actually meet our beloved Lord Marlowe from "And then he kissed her", but he has no extensive role and I was not sure how old he was in this, but they had three kids and the youngest daughter wasn't even properly walking). But he also knows that right now his ex-fiancee Beatrix is going to marry another man, more stable, someone good.

He thought that years might have dulled the passion and love but he was wrong. They kinda loved each other but also wore spikes of disappointment that the other person did not choose them.

The lively exchange sparked and the feelings were boiling.

Because they knew each other for so long, were inlove for so long and were so passionate about each other. But when it came to making a choice it felt like one person must sacrifice for the other person completely. And if they did who knows how their lived would have turned out.

Beatrix may not be everyone's cup of tea, she is the epitome of a lady, she wants a quiet life and she wants kids, she loves her life (or so she thinks).

But you can see that she has a streak for some adventure, when her father was gone she followed her relative to "relax" and actually started driving an automobile. Started to feel alive again.

She also met her fiance, felt that they might not really have feelings for each other but they can have enough affection to make this marriage work.

And then Will came back and all those plans flew out the window.

Along the way the engagement was cancelled, but Beatrix still didn't want to leave the shores of England and follow Will, no matter how Will tried to remind her that she had so much passion for things they talked about many years ago, not just because she tried to carry on the conversation, but that she wanted to go on a journey herself.

But I'd say I liked the last scene, the thrilling ride to catch up with the leaving train was fine, finally choosing the man she loves even if the way they're going will drop a shadow of scandal. And Will actually stayed behind. Like two close souls that decided to choose a person instead of everything else.

Note: Interestingly the second book is about the ex-fiance 😁 and her relative who taught her driving (who is actually in the middle of very unhappy marriage right now) yet to read that one.

RATE: 3,75/5.

[NOVEL] Wild Love by Elsie Silver

Backlog #12

Because of the success of Chestnut Springs in terms of fast and entertaining reads I thought of picking up the "latest" series by Elsie Silver - Rose Hill. It is mentioned is CS and also the protagonist of the first book is none other than Willa's brother.

Sigh...

She's been driving him wild for years . . . the good kind of wild.

The kind of wild that comes with wanting your best friend's little sister and knowing you can't have her.

Forbes may have labeled Ford Grant the World's Hottest Billionaire, but all he cares about is escaping the press and opening a recording studio in gorgeous small town Rose Hill. Something that comes to a screeching halt when he ends up face-to-face with a young girl who claims he's her biological father. Now, he spends his days balancing business with parenting a sullen twelve-year-old, all while trying desperately to keep his hands the hell off his best friend's sister, Rosie Belmont.

After living in the city, Rosie came blasting back into town like a storm. Beautiful, messy, and chaotic. And one wide-eyed, desperate plea for a job is all it takes for Ford to hire her. He vows to keep her at arm's length. Tries to stick to scowls and grumpy one-liners. But with her, verbal sparring is a type of foreplay―friction that soon turns to blistering heat.

Ford knows damn well he shouldn't cross this line. But shouldn't and can't are two very different things.

And the only thing he truly can't do is resist her.

Rose Hill. Book 1

I had a feeling when reading that Elsie Silver just took a jar with random tropes, shook it, took several cut papers from it and built a story around what she got.

I'd say this story tries to be several things at once and I'm not sure I like it.

Chestnut Springs weren't a very deep read anyway, but the characters felt kinda shallow to me.

The story follows several lines.

1st - Ford Grant has a daughter. The story behind it is kinda rediculous. Since their parents are wealthy but they did not want to have spilt kids they did not support any excesses, so what Ford thought about was being a sperm donor for money. Then she meets his daughter, whose father recently passed away, her mother is in a bad state and she needs help. I mean quite wild to me. Ford actually brings it upon himself to help the girl even before confirming she is his daughter. Ford does not want to overwrite her family and become a new one, basically he simply helps and they live together while her mom is getting help. Of course they all like the girl, although she is like 12 or smth (already managed to forget her age) she acts more mature. I mean she is fun to follow, but I think behnd all that relationship trouble between Rosalie and Ford she gets lost a bit.

There were several moments when she is said to be a cool kid instead of being shows, this is what I always have troubles with.

2nd - Rosalie and Ford. Tbh Ford acts like he is simping after Rosalie for so long, but I honestly don't get what kept him away from her. It's not like all those reasons felt too big. He was always there for her and even now when she needed a new employment after getting fired. But actually he starts to act up from time to time when he had no right to, so why he can do it now but decided not to do it then I was wondering.

My problem with how Rosie was described is that she basically noticed Ford now because he grew up and manlied up and wasn't as thin and lanky like before, basically was swooned by the masculine galore. But this felt so shallow. If it wasn't for her later figuring things out from the past she might never even noticed the guy. Anyway she suddenly has hots for him. But he is also her new boss.

This is the dynamic that I didn't like. Rosie got fired but basically it was before she could push the complaint about harassment, even though she was just touched but t is still harassment by her boss.

Now she is under Ford who actually reminds himself about being the boss all the time but it does not stop Rosalie, eventually doesn't stop them both. Felt weird.

I still have no idea why the plotline with the daughter was included, like what was the purpose of it all. From another side Rosie's lost journal (the one she actually threw out but was picked up by Ford) and the memory lane were quite a good path to take, but again felt a bit "not enough". It was nice to see the connection between past and the present to at least see why Ford is so hung up. Because partially this book does not play into Rosie's favor and you kinda want to get it why characters feel the way they feel and it's not simply an empty fact on paper.

In the end I felt unsatisfied. Maybe it's because my brain just couldn't coprehend why the story should involve so many things and thread in shallow waters when it could be nice story of having a nostalgic love and a chance.

After all Rosie spent so much of her time being the perfect child for her family, while her brother was always getting into troubles. She went to uni and landed a good job. But she realized that this life is not for her, but what about her achievements? What is truly important? Even her relationship that felt so good at first lacks in something she seeks from her partner.

And although we have a chance to see the change in Ford from the past, but I dunno, I just wished there was more about them, like an in-depth walk down the memory lane. Past and present. The significance of it all intensified.

Sigh...

RATE: 3/5.

[Historical Romance] The Lord Next Door by Gayle Callen

Backlog #11

This is the second book I DNF-ed during the period. And I do not regret it. Some books are just not it.

And even if there is nothing particularly bad about them, but they're kinda bland.

I was surprised because the beginning was so vigurous and promising.

(this is a new cover, obviously, this novel is from '05 and the original cover is pretty much early Photoshop)

To rescue her family from financial ruin, lovely Victoria Shelby has no choice but to marry. Her options for a bridegroom are limited...until she remembers the shy servant boy next door. Then she discovers that her childhood friend is actually Viscount Thurlow—ruthless businessman, future earl, and a man whose family is shrouded in scandal.

After two rejected marriage proposals, David Thurlow needs a wife who will give him an heir, someone who will not only overlook his past but also be above reproach. Victoria is the ideal candidate—quiet, unassuming, and in desperate need of funds. But even as she strives to be the perfect wife, her calm demeanor masks a shocking secret...one that is overshadowed by David's slow, heated lessons in the art of seduction that threaten to transform a "convenient" marriage into a torrid and passionate affair.

Sisters of Willow Pond. Book 1

This book started promising.

Vistoria had a journal hidden in the garden between two neighboring houses, but it was found by the neighbor's boy. The boy was actually the heir pretended to be cook's son.

The two had an extensive exchange in the journal as means of communication, it was lovely to see how the two shared something about their lives, and although David even used an alias, he still held this connection close to his heart, but this connection became thinner at some point when the two grew up.

Now years later Vistoria finds herself in predicament, her father who once was a figure with solid financial foundation left them with debts, soon they will be evicted from the house and have nowhere to go.

Note: Tbh several of similar premises made me think of what can woman in such situation do, since they're s dependant on men. Their father wasn't a lord, but a banker, but still.

Now that her two sisters went to work, she stayed in the house with her mother. She wasn't as talented as others in things that would be beneficial in a profession, she loved to play music the most and had affection for embroidery. But now they have nothing to sell in the house to keep on going.

And this is where she remembers the boy she conversed through journal and wanted to find him (yes, to marry him). Which to me already kinda dropped a shadow on the logic, since why would you think a cook's son will be able to handle this financially.

But then she finds out that David is the boy and he actually a lord.

David needed a wife, while she needed a husband. Due to David's father infamy he couldn't find a wife among the ton, so he directed this attention towards Vistoria and they made a deal.

I did not read much, Victoria felt kinda meek, but then I read that she will change and become almost a London's sensation... Since she is needed to support David in his political career as well.

But then when they basically only married or were soon-to-be married David had a meeting with a woman who was supposed to be his lover / mistress. Who actually was mentioned during one of the dinners and you could feel her weird vibes towards Vistoria.

I'm not a fan of such situations in general. I don't say that a man like a woman should come into marriage as a blank sheet, after all it's historical setting as well. But the need to make him have someone almost before marriage made me feel the ick. And plot-wise I saw no need.

But Victoria is good-natured and the first thing she did was think how good it would be to connect David and his father again. Mind you, she has no idea what the scandal was (for real no one talked directly what exactly happened) and this scandal made David bear the consequences for years. Why she thought of this I have no idea.

But this Victoria aka good wife material made me lose interest pretty quickly. The plot felt bland and not exciting at all. Although I could be thankful for one thing, there were time skips, which was nice.

It was obvious that all three books will be the Cinderella type of poor girl and a man in power coming like a knight in shining armor to save them and elevate their status.

So because I didn't vibe with the book I put it down. There is no need to hang on it just for the sake of finishing it. 

RATE: DNF.

[Historical Romance] How to Lose a Duke in Ten Days by Laura Lee Guhrke

Backlog #10

They had a deal...

From the moment she met the devil-may-care Duke of Margrave, Edie knew he could change her life. And when he agreed to her outrageous proposal of a marriage of convenience, she was transformed from ruined American heiress to English duchess. Five years later, she's delighted with their arrangement, especially since her husband is living on another continent.

But deals are made to be broken...

By marrying an heiress, Stuart was able to pay his family's enormous debts, and Edie's terms that he leave England forever seemed a small price to pay. But when a brush with death impels him home, he decides it's time for a real marriage with his luscious American bride, and he proposes a bold new bargain: ten days to win her willing kiss. But is ten days enough to win her heart?

An American Heiress in London. Book 2

Well, this was a good book but it also felt like a let down.

Edie is mentioned in the first book, she is kinda that one time when Belinda was mistaken and considered the union of Edie and Stuart as her personal failure, having no idea that this was Edie's goal to have a nominal husband all along, just so she won't have to return to New York where all her nightmares originated.

Stuart had a near-death experience in Africa and in those last moment he thought of Edie. Now that he survived he wants to go back and become a real couple with his wife, even if it means to break his promise.

By now he has no idea why Edie is s against their marital life and asked him to leave, so at least he holds hope in his heart that he can capture Edie's attention and they could be husband and wife.

I must admit some of his wording wasn't the best (by the way it sounded) that actually he wanted family, something eternal to have. I could understand the idea, but just the wording wasn't to my liking.

Stuart offers a 10-day deal, so they try to communicate and date to know each other more and by the end of it Edie must take initiative to kiss Stuart.

Edie is terrified at first, she is too traumatized by her experience (she was obviously SA'd in New York) and she can't imagine going to bed with another man. She has enough money to get out of the estate that became her own home just to distance herself and live a peaceful life she acquired.

Honestly, I felt so bad for Edie, although I may not agree with what happened in the end, but I just felt bad that he life and the joy she could have was destroyed by a man. She was stigmatized, her reputation ruined and it was a stroke of luck that she met Stuart who was ready to strike a deal with her, her money in exchange he goes to Africa, out of sight out of mind.

With their agreement of 10 days Stuart was really attentive and took things step by step, you could feel his sincerity. Part of the book they want to outwit each other.

All before he finds out the truth about what happened in New York.

Fro one side he tries to heal Edie and from another he has a plan how to destroy the man.

I must say I was not a big fan of how the whole deal was resolved.

Maybe it should have served as a comparison, but it kinda painted Stuart in bad light.

Because when they finally reached the final stage Stuart basically got lost in pleasure (too pent up after pining for so long) and forgot to pay attention to Edie only finding herself in a wrong condition. Like how is he different from the other man in that moment. And this moment was such a cliffhanger. In order to atone Stuart was ready to accept any punishment Edie wanted to bestow on him, but eventually when they had the peak heart-to-heart talk Edie explained why she froze. It's like things were different with Stuart, although she knows they're two different men but she realizes there is a room for change, but she also has her moments, she can progress from it, they can discuss what to do with it, she felt sorry for years her experience haunted her and ruined her life. All in all it felt like Edie came out of that experience by herself. But I honestly wished there was more depth to this part and more explanation.

This is why I say it felt like a letdown.

I could explain it only by how Edie left me with so many feelings throughout he book and how she felt, that I wanted that moment to be more profound, almost catrphic for her and myself as a reader.

So even if I like Laura Lee Guhrke as an author I do not think that every of her books will be perfect for me or that they can't have misses.

RATE: 3,5/5.

[NOVEL] Is She Really Going Out with Him? by Sophie Cousens

Backlog #9

I actually loved this one.

By now I think I've read several books that have age gap romance, but maybe it's the first time where I truly felt like people belong to different age demographic and FMC really had adult vibe to her.

Plus it has such a great outlook on the modern dating in general.

A hilarious love story about a disillusioned divorcée who agrees to let her children play matchmaker.

Columnist Anna Appleby has left her love life behind after a painful divorce. Who needs a man when she has two kids, a cat, and uncontested control of the TV remote? Besides, she’d rather be single than subject herself to the hell of online dating. But her office rival is vying for her column, and no column means no stable source of income. In a desperate attempt to keep her job, Anna finds herself pitching a unique angle: seven dates, all found offline, chosen by her children.

From awkward encounters to unexpected connections, Anna gamely begins to put herself out there, asking out waiters, the mailman, and even her celebrity crush. But when a romantic connection appears where she least expected it, will she be brave enough to take another chance on love?

I think the best thing I liked about it is how it handles dating, both online and offline.

Anna actually did not plan to date ever again, her kids were growing up, she had her job, everything went fine. Her marriage happened to be a disappointment because despite supporting her husband through the most depressing period of time and doing everything for the family, her husband did not see her efforts and decided to move on and move out. Basically seeking an easy way out in my opinion, he took care of his health, got into gym, divorced, saw his kids only few days a week, pretty neet that he didn't even do kids laundry when they were at his place, less obligations with his new girlfriend, also having audacity to give passive agressive remarks about how Anna looked. It's obvious I didn't like her ex-husband as a character.

I wasn't actually a fan of his girlfriend as well, because she passed as this vegan girl, who will scare your kids with bloody videos and traumatize them for life. She has no say in their upbringing, but feels the need to call themselves family etc. Girl, you're not their mom, chill. You're not even officially a wife, double chill.

In the midst of coming out of her divorce the publication she works for is being bought out and she may lose her job, now she has to bear more of herself and write thing demanded of her to keep it. So even if she's not happy about it, she chooses to follow through.

This is how her dating story for the column begins.

But on the opposite side of her is the younger co-worker who feel like he wants to take away her column. Ambitious and outgoing and it feels like he never had problems with dating. Hell, he might have dated every woman she knows at work.

Although his portrait in her head is like that, full of prejudices, the real person is way different from her impression and there is a reason for everything and he doesn't hate her at all.

Back to dating. This was an interesting part full of rollecoaster emotions. Because all men were so different.

For example the online dating guy who could not keep up with the previous topics happened to use a proxy when looking for dates, basically she never talked to the person in question before the date.

Or someone's dad from the school who seemed a pretty fine person, but when he started to pour shit on his ex and do some red flag things you were honestly worried for Anna's safety.

But there were also good people, like the mailman, they may have had a great date, it was unusual and in the end they could become friends.

Despite the even amount of weirdos and nice people it still held some sort of feeling of - don't be afraid of asking people out, try new things and maybe you will like them.

And along that line we have her rival Will Havers. At least she considershim a rival since they feel like clashing at work and she's the only woman not charmed by him.

Unlike Anna, Will is single, always sophisticated and good-looking as if he wakes up at 5am every day. But the real Will is so much more. He indeed has ambitions, he wants to do things greater than what he has now, but he stuck at this place for the sake of his family. He wants to expand his portfolio, this is why he wants to join Anna on this venture of dating with strangers. Will never disliked Anna, I think on the contrary he had something for her for some times. But their work together forced them together.

I kinda liked that the relationship may not be anything huge, but emotionally at least for Anna it was a rollecoaster. Like sometimes flirting, sometimes becoming daring, then doubtful, then disappointed, it was a whole array of emotions she went through. She came to like him a lot, but what is love sometimes - ability to let go. And this is what she planned to do. She knew his past, knew what he wanted to for his career, knew he was capable of more and did not want to bind him to herself and this relationship or having long-distance relationship or promise something where she already had a life and children and she did not want to deprive him of it when she knew he mentioned wanting kids, so she used his past story to hurt him and push him away.

It's lovely she had the bravery to fix it and confess on a large scale.

It was so fun to see how in the result of this venture she got several friends, told her husband what's on her mind and found new love.

I am truly great I found this novel randomly and decided to read it. The characters felt more dimensional, kids were like kids (annoying lol))) and the emotional ride felt multi-faceted and interesting.

Note: the novel isn't spicy, I mean you know they did the thing, but it does not go into descriptions of it and I'm not mad at it, it's a great emotional journey, a fun story.

RATE: 4,5/5.

[NOVEL] The Ex Vows by Jessica Joyce

Backlog #8

DNF-ed novel. But I still want to express my opinion on why I DNF-ed it

Georgia Woodward lives by her lists, none more so than the one about her ex, Eli Mora. It’s full of the ironclad dos and don’ts they’ve been following since she returned to the Bay Area after their cataclysmic breakup five years ago. 

 

With the wedding of their mutual best friend, Adam, looming, and them about to step into their roles as best woman and man, Georgia’s never needed it more. She refuses to threaten their tight-knit friend group with her messy—and still very present—feelings. The rules on that list will keep her cool, calm, and compartmentalized. 

 

What’s not on her list? Eli arriving from New York with a new rule-breaking attitude or the all-inclusive venue burning to the ground, leaving the bride and groom in dire straits. Nor does she anticipate Adam asking her and Eli to help him make a miracle happen. Together.

 

As Georgia and Eli rush up to Napa Valley to pull off the perfect wedding, their old chemistry comes back in technicolor. Somewhere between cake tastings gone wrong, disastrous DJ auditions, and Eli’s heated attention, Georgia starts recognizing the man she fell in love with before. And if she lets herself break her rules, she might find what they’re building isn’t the something old that ruined them—it’s a chance at something new.

Never trust reviews.

And I saw this in recommended by a YouTuber with quite a bit of following. At that time I had no idea they liked Magnolia Parks (novel I DNF-ed after 1st chapter because it felt repulsive).

All in all, you do not trust reviews, you can have enough followers, but it means nothing. your preferences are your preferences.

I DNF-ed the book because it was so not my cup of tea, not to mention it was prety boring and the conflict did not feel like a conflict at all.

I did not like FMC from the start, listening to her "purring" for being praised I was like - girl, calm down. I'm not the one who will like to read about people pleasers, I may support not being the one up to conflicts, but I won't go out of my way just to please people. Like for what? Few good words. If you do well you deserve those good words and if someone is shit, well, not destiny between you then.

But when I reached the part where the "reason" for the break-up was revealed I lost it.

Relationship is not always sunshine, but what amazed me is that when her partner was going through the toughest period of time she did not stick around.

Maybe it is a stretch to say that I dislike when people think their partner can get at least a bit of attention when they work themselves to the bone. You know sometimes your partner just wants to have some safe space, just want to watch the ceiling for hours. Let's wait for the moment when they come out of their stupor and then they can give you attention you need.

And we should be ready that this period may take quite some time, it's not a day or two, or week or two.

This is what the situation looked like to me, that Eli was too busy and too tired and Georgia started to feel neglected. Just from description I felt srry for Eli actually. I just know people and couples where the husband works more, works himself to the bone to provide for his family, but less working wife can start nagging about no time for her etc. I just think - the way he works himself to the bone isn't showcasing his care for you? It's not fancy words, but it's stability.

For Georgia she met Eli at a young age, what high school, what university, then moving in together and working. basically they never had a period where they were not together or not lovey-dovey I suppose. SO LIFE hit her so hard. If you want to be together you should navigate the hard parts too.

Maybe there is more to the story, but I did not bother to continue, I stopped at 23%.

Unlike the relationship troubles which weren't enough to be called troubles to me, we have the wedding part.

Tbh again I saw no trouble in that. I mean the situation indeed felt melodramatic, but if two people want to be together they would go for any ceremony, maybe will compensate each other later with something grander.

But no the thing is they want to have a bigger wedding and they want it now since the soon-to-be-wife is pregnant.

Of course no one can go to the venue and both Georgia and Eli volunteer to do it.

Georgia with her need to stick to her friends of course want to take it upon herself. Eli wants to be present now while he was busy with work for so long and neglected their friendship.

I've read some spoilers about it that they just resume the relationship.

But funnily eough I stopped at 23% and felt that the plot if there is any moves at a snail's speed.

Oh yeah, another part of Georgia that I wanted to roll my eyes at.

Why did she feel like she's just graduated? She does not read as a mature person to me. because she clings to all her friendships and relationships and in her own head it feels so dramatic as if they'll never see each other again.

Relationships change, okay. If sh had few more friendships she'd know that when your bffs marry or have a partner, they will have their own life and you will become a third wheel. Doesn't mean you can't continue to be friends, it's just that dynamics and prioroties change. it's not the end of the world. Some relationships may last long enough. I say this as a person who has people who contact me rarely, but we still have soft feelings for each other, wish each other only the best and we've known each other for more than 10 years.

Especially if you live away from each other. Georgia is being transferred if she'd like to, but honestly she feels like she wants to build a life around her friends instead of her own.

Of course she will have her own happy ending, otherwise this book wouldn't have been written, but I didn't click with any of it. Maybe I was expecting more, but got this instead. Maybe there is redeeming part about Georgia, but I don't care to find out.

RATE: DNF.

[Historical Romance] Lady Derring takes a lover by Julie Anne Long

Backlog #7

I've read a ton of Historical Romance, but I never came across Julie Anne Long before. You could say that thanks to recs on Goodreads I kept seeing their name when I added my faves to the collection. So I decided to check it out (especially the ratings felt quite high in the HR category).

And the series called Palace of Rogues called out to me.

Who knew I will be so disappointed.

(tbh an ugly cover, I like the style of covers like novels from 80'-90' the most or more vague and artsy instead of inaccurate dresses, modern-looking people and pictures too crisp and unnatural like they glaringly scream "I'm a Photoshop collage")

A mistress. A mountain of debt. A mysterious wreck of a building.

Delilah Swanpoole, Countess of Derring, learns the hard way that her husband, “Dear Dull Derring,” is a lot more interesting—and perfidious—dead than alive. It’s a devil of an inheritance, but in the grand ruins of the one building Derring left her, are the seeds of her liberation. And she vows never again to place herself at the mercy of a man.

But battle-hardened Captain Tristan Hardy is nothing if not merciless. When the charismatic naval hero tracks a notorious smuggler to a London boarding house known as the Rogue’s Palace, seducing the beautiful, blue-blooded proprietress to get his man seems like a small sacrifice.

They both believe love is a myth. But a desire beyond reason threatens to destroy the armor around their hearts. Now a shattering decision looms: Will Tristan betray his own code of honor…or choose a love that might be the truest thing he’s ever known?

The Palace of Rogues. Book 1

I WAS SO BORED.

I can't stress enough how bored I was by reading it. I think counting ants on the ground is more thrilling than this.

And I actually felt like I will be able to read it, since the beginning was so out of ordinary. Lady Derring meets the mistress of her husband, they're both in desperate situation and decide on their venture - boarding house.

Next thing is a grand and crazy plan on how to survive - remodel the building, having their own set of rules of who to allow inside (so this place will become a home for others)

But there is a secret about this building.

Basically it was a whore house in the past, now Dilalah wants it to become a borading house near the docks. They indeed renovated it quite a bit and were waiting for people to come over. But for some reason some bad rumors started spreading so people won't go there at all. Only few people became residents and one of them is our MMC and Captain Hardy.

Capain Hardy was cracking down smuggling all this time and one of the last cases before he plans to retire is to follow the lead on smuggled cigars. One of the leads is - Lady Derring, since the smuggling is connected to her late husband.

So we have the initial and potential conflict of the novel, he came with agenda, but managed to fall in love (about this "love" later).

But the entire novel is so boring and uneventful that it hurt. Not to mention that both characters felt kinda blind to obvious presence of cross-dressing men in the vicinity. And author doesn't make it a secret that something is very odd about two "sisters" who barely speak, look at you etc.

You would think there will be some sort of intrigue or anything else, but no.

They spent it felt quite some time just thinking of following those two "sisters" and figuring out that they're smugglers and /spoilers/ the Palace of Rogues has a secret passage, you could get there through one of the rooms, but it was occupied by unknown person from the very beginning, both smugglers wanted to trespass but never succeeded, the other part of the passage is in the neighboring stables, the problem was that there is a door between Palace and stables which was not only locked but blocked by crates, so they couldn't take things out without disturbance.

But what seemed illogical is that smugglers (according to Hardy) could scare the residents into obedience and just take the load away, but they never did it and waited until Hardy became a resident as well. Well, of course because Hardy was there and they knew his identity they never made a big move.

Anyway most part of the novel is how Delilah and Hardy just danced around each other, uneventful smuggling case which was so boring it was maddening.

This blindness to recognize to cross-dressing men who obviously looked rough dropped a shadow on Hardy's perfect image.

As for Delilah... well she is a kind person, but unlike kind she is also kinda naive and lacked self-preservance. Like the case with late-night visitor, if it wasn't for Hardy she would be assaulted. I mean no money are worth it, when she obviously had a gut feeling there was something odd about the man.

Naive because she believed in any story told, agan being blind to cross-dressing men (I'm surprised her more experienced partner, her husband's mistress did not recognize it as well) who also told her their own fairy tale how and why they need a shelter. It's not bad being kind, but she felt more stupid.

Note: find it ironic since Derring, sounds like "daring", but there is only one aspect in which Dililah is daring, wanting to get laid.

The "love" felt more like "lust". In historical romance it's sometimes hard to judge because there is an attraction almost from the first time people see each other, here it felt the same, the two noticed each other. But honestly it felt more like physical attraction than anything else and stayed like that for quite some time. All in all I did not buy it.

The only good part is that indeed few of the residents elt liek at home during this time despite the silly rules, on the contrary it allowed them to bond. Plus thery novel-y part about a couple who both escaped engagement and travelled to this place but eventually escaped to Gretna Green to marry.

This book made me want to DNF the rest of the series. I may try to read the second book, because it is about the mistress (she has ridiculous last name) and the mysterious resident that checked in first but never appeared.

RATE: 2/5. How people find it so appealing is above me.

[NOVEL] Hopeless by Elsie Silver

Backlog #6

I never mentioned it before but I noticed the presence of Harvey Eaton in all the books, it's not much, but that old man is my favorite, no wonder he even got his own extra episodes.

This book is about Beau Eaton and Bailey Jensen.

In Powerless we know that Beau was missing in action, but by the end of the book he is found. In Reckless he returned to the family after recuperating and he now is retired. Bearing severe burns on his feet. Winter is mentioned too because she helped him and she did not pamper him.

But now Beau is lost to what to do with his life in this small town, to others he is a hero, but he does not think of himself like that.

But then he goes to the bar where Bailey Jensen works and somehow the presence of this girl who does not consider him anything special helps him find inner peace he needed so much.

Beau Eaton is the town prince, a handsome military hero with a tortured past.

I’m the outcast bartender, a shy girl from the wrong side of the tracks.

He’s thirty-five and all man, and I’m twenty-two and all… virgin.

He’s also my fiancé. Correction: my fake fiancé.

We start out as a bet. He doesn’t believe that anyone holds my last name against me. So he offers me his to prove a point.

It’s win-win. He gets a break from his concerned family’s prying, and I get a chance to shed my family’s reputation while I save up to ditch this small town.

He says all I have to do is wear his ring, follow his lead, and pretend I can’t keep my hands off of him in public.

But it’s what happens between us in private that blurs all those carefully drawn lines.

It’s what transpires behind closed doors that doesn’t feel like pretending at all.

This engagement was supposed to be for show. This agreement? It has an end date.

He once told me he’d never fall in love.

And yet here I am, head over heels for my fake fiancé.

Chestnut Springs. Book 5

Unlike Beau, the town prince everyone is vying to know, Bailey is the town's pariah because of her criminal father and brothers who wrecked havoc for years. This is why people make it very evident how they disdain Bailey at every turn. Kinda caricature, but what do I know.

Beau does not believe in this.

They meet by chance at a small creek, since Bailey lives in a small trailer (actually pays rent and other stuff to her own brothers who never work) and she goes to the river to swim. This is where Beau finds her. He kinda got a wild idea of fake engagement so that his name would protect Bailey and she can develop and earn money, since she wants to leave this town where everyone hates her. And as for his own goals, although he loves his family dearly he really doesn't want them to continue worrying all the time or walking on eggshells etc.

But the thing is Bailey never actually conflicted with anyone about it and tried to keep things peaceful. But it never helped her in the long run.

She basically agrees because she does need his protection from her own brothers. She needs to earn more, she wants to leave. It's nice to see her not being one-sided. Like she admires Beau, think he's good, but also part of her has a spike when it comes to envy towards him, Beau can land a job easily, while she struggles just because of who she is.

The one thing kinda unhinged about her is how open she is abou sex. She is a virgin since no one would date her out of fear or because of a dare only, but she's a healthy young woman with needs and curiosity. So there's that type of line in their relationship.

But during her stay when she moved from the trailer to the house she figured that Beau has troubles with sleeping and he can't get away from it. This is why he often got really drunk at first at the bar and later he stopped (also connected to her). She can't leave him alone thus they decide to go swim in this sultry summer at night and slowly help Beau cope with it, more like overwrite the memories and what keeps him having nightmares.

They actually bond through many acts of kindness, not only tension.

But the main "problem" was that Beau, as Bailey thought, will stay in this town and she will go outside, so they kinda have no future together. Not to mention she finds out that Beau is the owner of the only place that hired her as a bartender for years. Of course she's hurt. But at least she had finally burst with dissatisfaction towards people and told them all how they treated her like shit for years when she never deserved it.

Beau wouldn't be him if he let the girl he fell in love with go, so he decided he changed his course of life. For Bailey wasn't the only one this town was quite suffocating. Although he promised to help with the ranch after retirement it was so not his, he wanted to do something he wanted, so he decided to become a firefighter. He landed the job in the city so he could be with Bailey. And this is where they moved together.

It was nice to see one person finding the right one who helped them heal and return to normal, while the other person also found themselves, they really worked for each other in the best way possible.

RATE: 3,75/5. It's not a bad rating though, it was a fine conclusion, just in comparison to other books in the series this is the place it takes for me.

[NOVEL] Reckless by Elsie Silver

Backlog #5

In the previous book there was a scene with Winter (Summer's sister) and Theo (Rhett's protege) that hinted the next couple on the agenda. At this point when all books since long been released it is pretty obvious that they are protags of Reckless, but imagine the excitement. I would be excited if I found out, despite the fact that Winter seemed like a total b-word in the first book, such characters intrigued me.

Theo had a bit of head over hills moment with Winter in this small episode. And who knew it was actually the very trigger of their journey.

Theo Silva. Rowdy bull rider. Notorious ladies’ man. Scorching hot trouble wrapped up in a drool-worthy package.

And he’s looking at me like I might be his next meal.

But I’m almost free of my toxic marriage and have sworn off men entirely. So all I see when I look back is temptation served up with a heaping side of heartbreak.

The man is hard to trust—and even harder to resist.

Make that impossible. Because Theo is persistent. And no matter how hard I try to freeze him out, he melts my icy exterior and pulls apart all my defenses.

Over a drink in a small town bar, I blurt out my deepest, darkest secrets. Then I spend the singular hottest night of my life with him.

He worships my body. He makes me blush. I come alive beneath his hands.

Then I tell him to forget it ever happened. I want simple, and with him it all feels complicated.

It was supposed to be a one-time thing.

A secret.

But that little plus sign is going to make this secret impossible to keep.

Chestnut Springs. Book 4

Their parents had a lot of fun calling them Summer and Winter, yeah I was surprised too.

I actually really wanted to find out more about their dynamics and this book kinda leans into it too.

I won't be able to imagine how does it feel to end up in a situation like theirs, that they're half-sisters, one is a result of an affair. But relationships of people are coplex and so it happens that Summer longed for her sister and in a way wanted to protect her (her marriage) by keeping her silence, but Winter too had been keeping her own vengeful mother away from Summer. And even if she was instilled with all type of malicious words her mother had to say about Summer, it never really corrupted her, but deinitely influenced some of her temperament.

Others say that she is a cold-ass queen, but not many know that she is much softer inside.

The revelation of her own husband grooming her own sister before their marriage totally broke this marriage apart. She couldn't be with such a person and forgiving him was out of the question. While dealing with her own shit she travelled to Chestut Springs, one of Eaton house family dinners where she met Theo on the road. This led them to have drinks later on in town and the next thing you know they roll into sheets and have sex.

One-night stand resulting into Winter becoming pregnant. For her it was a blessing, she really wanted children and never got pregnant in marriage. When the revelations happened she lost the baby she was carrying. Partially, even if it sounded cruel, she was glad she lost it, she didn't want to be blood-tied to someone like her ex-husband.

Of course she wanted to keep the child, but she had no idea how to contact Theo, she only figured one way, finding his info in the gym database owned by Summer. But the communication failed (although to a reader it feels obvious the one answering isn't Theo).

We have a time skip and now Winter is a single mom living in Chestnut Springs, she is on maternity leave, her work is transferred into this town.

When one day Theo comes into town. And things change.

Theo is devastated not because he has a daughter, he is too happy to have a daughter, but because he thinks of everything he missed during this time, he realized that the number he left with the gym was actually left with someone in his agency and they did not think it was important to report while he was on a road.

He wanted to be in life of Winter and his daughter and showed with actions his support, love and reliability.

The two had to re-navigate their lives and slowly come together as partners.

It felt so unfortunate that Theo missed so much of his daughter growing up, but now he would never miss her future.

Winter was finally happy with her life. She did not bother with her mother who could even justify her ex-husband. She kinda reconnected with her father. Deepened her relationship with Summer, had new friends surrounding her, had the help of the Eaton family, which really felt like real family. Also Theo's mom has an appearance in this one and she is such a nice lady.

The final conflict I don't think is anything big. More like - again this annoying ex. 

Also Winter decides to be a doctor on the road along with Theo so they could be together.

But by this time I had a feeling Elsie Silver has some sort of jar or just uses a roulette and picks up random stuff from it.

RATE: 4/5. There is something about good young dads.

[NOVEL] Powerless by Elsie Silver

Backlog #4

After finishing the second book in the series I was on  the roll and decided to read the next one.

Two childhood friends. Two broken hearts. One impromptu road trip to get away from everything. That’s all this was supposed to be. Afterall, I’ve been living in the friend zone for years now.

But hockey heartthrob Jasper Gervais isn’t looking at me like a friend anymore. And he isn’t touching me like one either.

To his fans, he’s the handsome, talented athlete on TV. But to me he’s still the lost boy with sad eyes and a heart of gold.

The man I’ve loved in secret for years.

So when my life falls apart on my wedding day, it only makes sense that he’s the one to swoop in and save me. And when his world comes crashing down around him, I’m there to return the favor.

But the more time we spend alone, the more Jasper doesn’t feel like a friend at all. He feels like everything I’ve ever wanted and thought I could never have.

Our feelings aren’t straight forward though. They twist and turn around the pain of his past and the reality of my present.

Jasper Gervais acts like he wants me.

But after years of turning me away, he’s going to need to prove it.

Chestnut Springs. Book 3

It's all spoilers baby.

I'd shortly call it the story of two oblivious and pining. And the pining is loud and clear.

Sloane felt like she was attracted to Jasper since day one when she first saw him. Jasper may not be the part of the Eaton family by blood, but he's like an unofficial official brother.

Jasper treated Sloane really well. Sloane knew that her feelings for Jasper has been going on for years.

But neither of them took a step forward.

Only when Sloane sees a video of her soon-to-be-husband with some stripper during bachelor's party she decided to escape. Everything that led to this day was actually stiffling like a tight collar, but she allowed herself to be brought into this arranged marriage. Even if her fiance did not understand her, did not treat her well etc.

Jasper took Sloane away and they temporarily escaped.

But the devastating news arrive that Beau Eaton is missing in action. And with how Beau was the one who saved him from the streets and became the closest person it was hard on Jasper to cope with it and continue play normally. His coach made the best decision - sending Jasper home, especially after knowing the news Jasper kept away. Big spoiler but Jasper's sister died in an accident and he puts the blame of this accident on himself. His family fell apart after the accident, his mother got into trouble and d* but his father moved away and got new family, leaving Jasper cmpletely alone. So it's the second time he loses someone very importnat to him.

So both of them needed a time off and it's kind of a forced proximity when the two agree to deliver hay miles away and share this ride. Although it felt like they're closer than ever but there are still walls surrounding them.

And only an accident helps Jasper realizes that he spent too much time worrying about the woman he wants but can't have, but does it matter if they can one moment be taken away from each other, why not spend this moment cherishing each other.

Sloane was not impressed at that moment. Her motivation is that she spent so many years loving him and finally decided to take a step away, she almost married another man. The breaking moment was she asked him to the prom and he refused (but priorly agreed? slipped my mind). She was devastated thinking her feelings will never be returned.

But she never knew that his reason was not only because he was afraid, but he was also threatened by her father. And Sloane comes from a very wealthy family, so her dad could easily stiffle his only career he loved and any career he could have had. What is a young man against a giant. She had no idea and was devastated by what her father did. And that was part of the problem. Jasper saw her father for who he was, manipulative and not letting women in his life outside of his control. You could see by the look of Sloane's mom. This is why when she decided to make a closure to the manipulation and break free she told her father off personally, choosing what is right over her prior feelings for her dad and her almost blind belief in him.

Well, now it was better for them, Jasper was after all a popular player and Sloane had her own career as a ballerina. They do come together and she supports him during the rest of the season after the good news that Beau was found.

RATE: 3.5/5. I'm this far with rating because this book made me mostly sad. And at the moment of me reading it I didn't want any angst in my life, I had enough of my own. Jasper I think has it the worst out of all Chestnut Springs male main characters. His fate is so tragic. Even if he is so famous but you know he doesn't like his fame at all. He tries to blend with surroundings at all times. And only loving Sloane and having hope made him more open.

[NOVEL] Heartless by Elsie Silver

Welcome to Backlog #3.

By this point I had no idea that I will end up reading the entire series book after book. And in the end I will find that somehow because of Willa being kinda unhinged as a character I will like this book the most? Each book is quite different tbh. But after reading it all I could finally understand why people like it. It's easy, it's fast and it's quite okay.

(chose this cover among others, since it's neutral and I like it more)

Working as a nanny for the world’s grumpiest single dad should have been simple. Except I can’t keep my eyes off him. And he can’t keep his hands off of me.

Cade Eaton is thirteen years older than I am and barely looks my way. Until I get him into the hot tub one night for a game of truth or dare. Then all bets are off—and so are our clothes.

He’s gruff, a little rough around the edges. But broad-shouldered ranchers with calloused hands and filthy mouths are this city girl’s kryptonite. So who am I to resist?

But it’s in our quiet moments together that he softens. It’s when he takes care of me that I realize his hardened exterior is just a façade. It’s when I watch him go all sweet with his little boy that I really fall for him.

Someone convinced him once that his best wasn’t good enough. But I’ve never felt more cherished than I do in his arms.

My contract may say this arrangement is only for two months.

But my heart says this is forever.

Chestnut Springs. Book 2

I mean what a fateful encounter. Cade and Willa meet by accident, not to mention that Willa loses her panties and Cade had to keep them.

Willa is Summer's friend from the first book and Cade is Rhett's older brother.

Cade is a single dad who takes care of the ranch, while all other Eaton boys are away, but he also has a son from the first marriage, nice boy Luke. But it is hard to find a nanny in this small town because a lot of people see him as a golden bachelor, despite having a kid. And Cade is not interested in women who are eyeing this position just to get to him.

Summer knows that Willa has a window of few months when she has nothing to do, the bar she works at is going through renovations and she jumps at the idea of being a nanny for few months. She instantly loves Luke and Luke also likes the lively and beaming Willa. Despite having a famous dad and a sex therapist mom, Willa did not grow up entitled or spoilt. But she also does not know what to do with her life, this is why she easily comes and goes. The nany job felt okay. Even if they did not agree with Cade at first (the panty situation too), she still stayed.

But the thing is you could feel that Cade noticed Willa at once. Knowing that she is now his nanny it was beyond his power to make a move.

Willa found Cade grumpy and disagreebale, but she knows best to look behinde that facade, especially when she sees how he treats his kid or how he took care of her when she got sick. She is attracted to this handsome man.

Willa may be loud and unhinged, but she is truly loyal and protective of people she likes. This especially comes to Luke.

What I liked about the two of them is that they were quite opened about starting liking each other and wanting to be together, it wasn't anything like dancing around and not being able to be honest with each other, and so they did even before the sudden pregnancy hits the deal. I did nto expect that. I just remember this book as the least problematic in terms of conflicts and stuff like that. They don't have too much of personal baggage, so they could easily proceed to the next step.

Note: I think for this series it is important to read all the books. Because of the information shared and also some of the cross overs between timelines. It's a nice touch.

RATE: 4,5/5.

[NOVEL] Deep End by Ali Hazelwood

Welcome to Backlog #2.

This is my very first Ali Hazelwood book ever. I heard a lot about her where people either rave or not.

I was hoping for a quick read and a good distraction and it did not bother me that the book promised to have kinks.

Spoilers: this part was quite mild. I mean after I read other books, this book was quite tame and other books did not explore kinks at all. I wasn't mad, but I heard other people were mad since they expected...I wonder what type of debauchery they expected though.

(love the color scheme)

Scarlett Vandermeer is swimming upstream. A Junior at Stanford and a student-athlete who specializes in platform diving, Scarlett prefers to keep her head down, concentrating on getting into med school and on recovering from the injury that almost ended her career. She has no time for relationships—at least, that’s what she tells herself.

Swim captain, world champion, all-around aquatics golden boy, Lukas Blomqvist thrives on discipline. It’s how he wins gold medals and breaks records: complete focus, with every stroke. On the surface, Lukas and Scarlett have nothing in common. Until a well-guarded secret slips out, and everything changes.

So they start an arrangement. And as the pressure leading to the Olympics heats up, so does their relationship. It was supposed to be just a temporary, mutually satisfying fling. But when staying away from Lukas becomes impossible, Scarlett realizes that her heart might be treading into dangerous water...

So yeah, either hit or miss this one for many too.

My main issue with this novel must have been that it wanted to be many things at once. Like we had an extensive professional line, which involved Scarlett trying to recover from her inability to make the same jump that landed her the injury in the first place. We also have a relationship line, which does not start at once. We also try to explore some sexual things, although they end up being underwhelming to many viewers and they still search for what was promised. We try to see more of other characters and the development of friendship, which many find not it.

I think I was sitting and thinking after reading that all lines tried to thread through shallow waters.

But was it bad? I personally quite liked it, I don't know why the chemistry between Scarlett and Lukas clicked for me. Scarlett surely has her own issues, but she's too corked up. Maybe I saw something in her and this is why I cans ay this, while I could understand that if her behavior is too alien for you, then of course you will feel distant or something else. Pretty usual thing for any book, not everyone is relatable. Some said she is insufferable, but when I read about Pen, that girl had issues for me.

So how did we end up here? Scarlett accidentally knows that Pen and Lukas broke up. The two did not announce it for a reason (though it sounds silly and a bit selfish tbh. Lukas gets nothing from but Pen is still the official gf of a champion, much envied by others). Partially it didn't matter at that point. It felt like Pen wanted to have fun with other people outside her dependant relationship (which we learn about later), but also felt like she is leaving some exit behind? Anyway Lukas did not care at that point.

But it was Pen who actually took it upon herself to share the preferences of Lukas with other people (Scarlett) and Scarlett also explained about her own preferences. So once a drunk Pen had no better idea than to put two people together just because they like what they like... like girl for real? Not to mention sharing personal info with not a close person, but now this.

At this point in time Pen and Scarlett did not develop some sort of "friendship". But it is easy to stay close since their team of female divers felt so small.

Lukas actually sent Scarlett an inviting message, like if you decided to do it, I'm open to it, if you do not feel ike it, then we won't do it and live our lives.

Scarlett eventually decided to go for it and before doing anything the two sat down with almost a questionnaire to figure out what they like. Actually when it comes to stuff like that it is quite importnat to figue things out. Pretty responsible even if they were an average couple, just so they could get the best of their intimate life.

Their chemistry is so great because they have similar preferences. They did not involve feelings into this at first. But you couldn't say Lukas was completely an unfeeling dude. On the contrary it felt like they fulfilled each others needs but also with care?

Lukas felt like that type of efficient dude, very straightforward, perceptive. I think he suited Scarlett pretty well, since she felt kinda in a mess and his direction lead her in the way that helped her deal with her own stuff.

But the final coflict felt kinda meh tbh. A bit all over the place?

Spoilers but Scarlett and Lukas were together and developed feelings for each other, but Lukas never  publicly brought up the fact he broke up with Pen (though how no one notice I have no idea and why he never did it..). Pen had a bit of selfish ownership thoughts about Lukas too. Like she had her own fun, but when things did not go well she thought she might return to Lukas, but boy was gone. Then the two were busted as if they cheated on Pen, one was her bf and another was her friend. Scarlett shut down and basically left, before the truth was revealed. She travels to Lukas and agrees to be together.

There are other bits and pieces that were kinda all over the place.

RATEL 4/5. I already explained that I'm giving it more because I clicked with the book and got what I wanted from it.